Exile in basementville

Lucas and I have been exiled to the basement while a bunch of chattering women-folk throw C a bridal shower. I really hope she has a good time. In the meantime, we're down here, and I'm watching Lucas hurl his toys all over my newly cleaned basement. Oh, and Kirby's down here, too. So, with all of that in mind, what follows are random observations about being exiled to a basement in East Point, GA:

-"Tommy Boy" is less funny than I remember it.

-Safe Auto Commercials suck on a profound level.

-Instead of taking his toys out of the tub to play with them, Lucas has emptied the entire tub, climbed inside, and is now playing with all the toys within arm's reach of the tub from inside it.

-Getting licked in the armpit by a puppy feels quite strange.

-Kirby is terrified of a dancing puppy toy. This strikes me as very funny.

-I need to find a place to put up our dart board.

-"Every time I drive down the road, I wanna jerk the wheel into a bridge abutment!" would have been so much funnier if he had said something about a drug overdose.

-Apparently I'm being equated to a used microwave upstairs. Hell of a game!

-My son Can't decide if he wants to eat a cracker or a drumstick.

-And now he has discovered the magic of banging that drumstick againt one of the hollow iron support pylons for our house. At least he's not eating it anymore...

-There is a Calendar for 2005 on the wall of our basement. This calendar is courtesy of a chinese restaurant. I would be nice if it were current, or if that restaurant were still in business.

-Everything in this room is free game to be smacked with a drum stick.

-An asthmatic fat guy and a hyper-active two year old dancing like crazy to Dexi's midnight runners. If anyone else were down here I'm pretty sure they'd be laughing their asses off.

-Beer is out. This does not bode well. Fucking Bible belt...

-So much ice cream, so little spoon.

-Midwestern people are funny; as are their accents and dietary selections.

I have about ten minutes of bettery power left, so this is it. Just know that we are still trapped down here. If we don't make it, please tell C I love her and need her more than air, and make sure that no one lame gets any of my instruments.

Pray for me.